haven’t blogged about this cause it was a lil’ too fresh, but i suppose it’s time (namely cause of an email i got from a devoted reader inquiring…) – j aka james aka thor and i stopped seeing each other a bit ago.

first it was a shift from serious to casual, then a full on stop.

sure it hurt / sucks / not where i wanted to be right now; but there’s nothing to be done (or said, really) about it.  i just felt like i needed to acknowledge it here, cause this is where i acknowledge everything.  what bothers me most is the potential i saw in it.  i really, truly believe it could have been something great.   all in all, i’m just sad about it.  not crushed, not devastated, not even mad.  just sad.

we’re trying to be just friends (which we both really want), but it’s difficult cause we both still have feelings.  and i for one have never been good at just switching feelings off.  however, i’d rather have him in my life than not at all.  and it will get easier i’m sure.

at the end of the day i guess i should be kinda happy about everything – this proved i still have it in me to date/care for someone.  and to be perfectly blunt, i wasn’t sure that i had it in me after nick (a saga that pre-dates the sr…sl/atomic pop!). 


(if he’s still reading, he’ll get this)